Wineconed Wednesday – Easter Edition

It’s Holy Week. Or, if you don’t subscribe to that particular theme of afterlife happenings, it’s just about time for CHOCOLATE BUNNIES!

Just about a decade ago (good grief did time go by quickly), my grandmother and I decided to tackle Lent together. We gave up chocolate. The night before Easter, I stayed up until midnight – watching the seconds tick by until the moment I could maim my milk chocolate rabbit and devour his ears.

I’m looking forward to those ears. That’s right – I’m staring you down golden-foiled See’s bunny.

I revamped my personal site this week. (More on that in another post.) I just wanted a few last-minute tweaks. How hard could editing the CSS code be? Yeah, this is me banging my head against my own winecones. A coder/programmer/designer I am not. Then yesterday at work, I received an audio text. It played. Loudly. Oh. My. God. I’m *THAT* coworker.

So I’ll be sitting here with my cone of shame if you need anything.


My job is the equivalent of trying to fit Veruca Salt through the dejuicer. If you ever want to switch jobs, I totally think you’re more than qualified to do my job.

Editor’s note: Not only is your place a circus, but I’m guessing your Wonka factory doesn’t come with happy fun time everything-is-an-edible-sweet pure imagination room. That’s a big negative. While I do appreciate your offer, I shall politely decline via winecone. Anything science is kryptonite for me (and ultimately a very sad ending for our little Veruca.) However, with the promise of wine and far gentler cones – I invite you to come join our writing team!



Editor’s note: I can only assume you are a former fellow Yahoo. My thoughts are with all of you who may be affected by today’s rumored layoffs numbered in the multiple thousands. May you all go on to bigger and better things. A simple slew of winecones at the challenges ahead.


To the little man zipping and weaving in and out of traffic in your Mercedes convertible. It’s raining. And you’re a moron.

Editor’s note: I bet he has a Bluetooth headset permanently affixed to his ear, too. Clearly someone ate his bunny ears. But seriously, behaviors like this are where the little man Napoleon complex stereotypes come from. I’ve seen these guys – you just want to lay down a spikey winecone strip and watch the weaving speedster blow out his tires.

A mouth-watering smackaroo to chocolate. See’s Assorted Chocolates, chocolate bunnies, chocolate covered strawberries, robin eggs. <Drooool….> Come to the dark side – we have better chocolate.

And on that note a kiss to those of you who make me smile. (Also, chocolate makes me smile. Just sayin…) I’ve been told you’re never fully dressed without one – I look to you peeps for the inspiration to complete my outfit. (And try throwing some winecones of your own. It’ll make you smile.)

‘Till next week, winecones and kisses! (Unless you steal my bunny ears – then only angry angry winecones for you.)


*Leave your Winecones in the comments or email us at or and we’ll add yours next week!


Filed under A Nervous Tic Motion, Wineconed Wednesdays

2 Responses to Wineconed Wednesday – Easter Edition

  1. Seriously, an audio text message? Is that like one of those greeting cards that when you open it someone or something equivalent to a cat on crack sings Happy Birthday? And, you opened it in cubeville for all your coworkers to enjoy?

    I think you need to re-read some of my can’t we just get along posts.

    P.S. Was it a cat on crack singing? Because that would be funny.

  2. 1) I didn’t even know you could send audio texts.
    2) Thank you for rubbing it in. I already said I had my cone of shame!

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