I diapered the muppets. For fun (I know – we get ca-razy here), I let the boys wander around in their diapers while I went to dispose of the evidence.
In the 60 seconds I was away, I heard a crash and a cackle. Continue reading
Category Archives: Destroy
Potty Like a Rock Star
A Nervous Tic Motion: Little Heartbreaker
Big News! Things have changed with the group site I joined a couple months ago. Fresh start, fresh look, new name.
<Drumroll please>
Meet…A Nervous Tic Motion. (Same great site.) Toddlers to teenagers, children make life crazy. (And as it turns out, all us writers were certifiably crazy long before piling parenthood on top of our neuroses.) Admit it, you’re starting to get a nervous tic just thinking about it. Continue reading
Potty Humor, Part II
For those of you eagerly playing along at home, the score is now 4-for-4. And yes, this is the second post in a week dealing with bodily fluids.
Search bit another one of his friends this afternoon and served actual time in the official preschool penalty box.
It was one of those days. Continue reading
Run…Amuck
Do. Not. Like. Daylight Savings. Time change = bad.
Disclaimer: This post is not for the feint of heart. Also, I am well aware that the following is likely the result of my own actions. However, for the sake of consistency, we’re going to blame the time change. Continue reading
It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown
It’s all Hallows Eve. Day of the Dead. Children hide themselves within cute and clever costumes (except for a slew of teenagers that showed up at my house). They go door to door in search of fun-sized candy – threatenng tricks to those who dare to proffer raisins or toothbrushes. (Seriously! Who does that?!)
And this year, I have toddlers. So it was with tremendous pride that the muppets cleverly disguised themselves as muppets. Kermit and Fozzie Bear hit the town tonight. Continue reading
The Rainbow Connection
I got a message from my cousin yesterday – she’d found The Muppets: The Green Album. Along with deliciously caffeinated overpriced coffee-like drinks, Starbucks is also selling hipster music albums these days.
How could I pass up THE MUPPETS? “An assortment of today’s top artists put a twist on familiar selections from The Muppet songbook.” Continue reading
Ball!
Search has a new word. “Ball.” He is very proud of his new linguistic acquisition.
This morning, both boys came toddling into the bedroom together where I was getting ready for work. They were giggling and babbling incoherently to one another. (I’m pretty sure they were plotting some intricate mischief.) I had to take a step back just to watch their interaction. Time passes so quickly. Continue reading
Supermen
The muppets have been in daycare for a month. Three days into this adventure, they got the sniffles. “It’s gonna come quick and it’s gonna hit hard,” their teacher warned.
Early this week, a clingy Search was deposited in Daddy’s arms. “He’s a little toasty and he just doesn’t seem himself,” the teachers informed us. Continue reading
Transition to Toddlerhood
My demarcation line between “baby” and “little boy” has always been toddlerhood. Toddlers are WAY bigger than babies. They’re like little people.
Well, look how far we’ve come from Tiny. This morning I found myself grunting as I heaved Destroy into his car seat – such typical mom behavior that I couldn’t even fathom a year ago. Last year, after the cause celebres arrived home, I could write a blog post with my laptop on my lap (shocking place for it, I know) and have Destroy lying on my chest – with no feelings of overcrowding or “don’t burn the baby with a hot electronic device.” Continue reading
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Babies First Haircut
The lady stared at the side-by-side double stroller for a good 30 seconds, making silly faces at the muppets. Suddenly she looked up. “You have two!” she exclaimed. Congratulations stranger lady, you can count. She resumed cooing. “Boy and a girl?” she asked casually.
Negative ghostwriter. Continue reading