What’s My Name Again?

I am pleased to share that after this past week’s adventures in p-neumonia, cadet has now been prescribed Amoxicillin. (You ever feel we’re facing a future where many of the greatest great band names will come be the direct result of Auto Correct? I can see it now: Cadet – with lead guitarist, Search Stream.)

My iPhone keeps insisting Search’s name is Cadet. It’s not that far off really – Search means “spirit of battle” and my Webster’s dictionary iPhone app tells me cadet is essentially a small soldier (I paraphrase).

This is not the point. We had a whole slew of criterion for naming the muppets. I did not choose Cadet. That would just be weird. (Mostly because I am not presently a celebrity looking to support the future of the therapy industry by bestowing a wackadoo name upon my progeny. I’m looking at you Norman Lear – who names their daughter Chanda?! You didn’t see me naming the muppets River and Forest now did you?)

As I mentioned in my Weird Sisters review, those characters undoubtedly found it difficult to live up to such renowned fictional namesakes. The current book discussion over on BlogHer takes that notion into account and asks, “Do you Like Your Name?”

Kinda.

Here’s the funny thing about my name – I’ve never actually used it.

I’m a Patricia. (This is why my name is NOT spelled with an “sh” anywhere within.)

But I’ve never been called that in my life. At least not by anyone who knows me. There have been the rogue legal encounters, but otherwise – it’s all Tricia.

I like that name. But much like my personal bubble (do not invade my personal bubble), I absolutely despise the familiar shortening. “Hey Trish.”

Too often, someone I’ve never met before will be introduced to me as Tricia (that being my name and all) and immediately deem themselves buddy buddy with me. This instantly makes me skeptical that you’re trying to sell me something – metaphysical, metaphorical or material. And then I don’t like you so much. (Consider yourself warned.)

Guess what. We’re not there yet. Oh sure, *we’re* there – you can call me whatever you like. But I like you.

Except Patty.

Let me be VERY clear on this. I. Am. Not. A. Patty.

Years ago I was sitting in my cube, clicking away on my keyboard. My phone rang. And, as much as I recoiled at the thought of whatever random issue the caller needed me to deal with, I plucked up the handset from the cradle and began – then as I do now for every professional phone call – “Hello, this is Tricia.” (This is what one might call, “a clue.”) This is how the conversation went. I am not making this up.

Caller: Is this Patty Casserole?
Me: I’m sorry, you have the wrong number.
Caller: This is HR. I’m looking for Patty Casserole.
Me: Ok. I’m sorry, you have the wrong number.
Caller: Corp Comms department? Been here 4 years. Works under Mary?
Me: Well, um, yeah. That’s this department – but there’s no one here by that name.
Caller: Huh. Employee number 12345?

Suddenly a wave of realization washed over my clueless head. (And this was WAY before mommy-brain.)

Me: Are you looking for Patricia Cosaro?
Caller: Yes, that’s what I’ve been asking.

(No it’s not.)

Me: This is Tricia.
Caller: Great. Patty, I need to set up a meeting…

Seriously?!

In any case, I’m pretty sure I’ve discovered my nom de plume should I find myself faced with the desire to write under fictional cover.

12 Comments

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12 Responses to What’s My Name Again?

  1. Gramma j

    Nom de plume is Patty Casserole? Seriously?

  2. Dorothy

    This is a battle I have fought all my life. Dorothy. I like it because not everyone has it. But I don’t really like it. But I do. Sorta. Sometimes. Sigh. Then again, when I was adopted at 12, I was given the option to change my name and I could not come up with one I could answer to comfortably. So I kept it. I am named after an aunt who died in childhood that much I do know so it wasn’t after the Wizard of Oz (which I totally collect).
    Do. Not. Call. Me. Dot or Dottie or Dodie. Teachers always wanted to call me that. Occasional people I meet want to do that. NO. Not my name. I am not a Dot, thank you very much.
    Do I like my name? Yes and no. LOL

  3. Great Aunt J

    The Patty Casserole story IS one of my favorites – is it one of yours Trish? 🙂

  4. Gramma J

    what is your name? Gespacho? Gestapo? Ghestevio? no my name is Gustavo , ok and how do you spell it? G U S T A V O…….ok ok thank you Bruce……..
    can we call you GUS ? nooooooo
    ok to call me Gpa Stavo. capito??????

  5. Nancy Welker Caracciolo

    River and Stream….Patty Casserole….Gespacho…. bwhahahah.
    You guys are cracking me up today!
    I love my name. Being born 3 months early, 1 lb. 11.5 oz, in the ensuing chaos, they could have named me something truly dreadful! The only difficulty is the similarity to the name of the mother on the Mary Tyler Moore Show – Nancy Walker.

  6. Stephanie

    I used to go by Steph. I have not gone by Steph since I was about 16. So unless you have known me since the time I had braces and no fashion sense, do. not. shorten. my. name. Yes, it does assume a familiarity that I am not comfortable with and I will immediately be on edge.

  7. Stephanie

    Also, “Steffy” is never, never, NEVER GONNA HAPPEN. Seriously. I had a great, great aunt that called me that, but she was in her 90’s and nobody told her what to do. she alone got away with it.

  8. Great Aunt J

    Ouch – I do admit I’ve called you Steph – promise, I’ll try to change!

  9. Pingback: Feel (Find or Fear) the Teal | Stream of the Conscious

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