This is My Life

As you know, when I’m in my working mommy mode, I live the glamorous life of chic PR chick. (Ha. Ha.) Today I had an event.

In the city.

Yay.

I knew we were expecting inclement weather today. And San Francisco is often a bit chilly. (The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco.) Believe me, I considered wearing every article of clothing I own – hey it worked for Joey from Friends (granted those were Chandler’s clothes, but I digress…)

Instead, I donned a business suit, dropped off the boys at daycare (gasp – bad mommy) and headed straight up to the city. I envisioned myself cocooned in corner comfy chair at Starbucks – sipping café latte and clicking away on my keyboard – the picture perfect poster of the digital communication lifestyle.

Two hours later (and one inadvertent scenic city detour) I completed the 45-minute commute and pulled into the parking lot.

My phone buzzed. And like a good mobile worker (or because I have an obsessively intense aversion to the blinking red alert), I immediately checked my email – with one message concluding, “Enjoy the city.”

I looked up through my foggy windshield, trying to peer through the pouring rain I could feel pulsing and pounding on my car.

It was pouring. I had no umbrella.

Well, now or never, I thought. Actually, I thought it would be far more fun to run down the street dramatically screaming, “I’m melting! I’m melllttting…” whilst sinking into the puddles already soaking my pant legs.

I gathered my belongings and began slogging toward AT&T Park, Home of Your San Francisco Giants. (I say “your,” because they are sure as heck not *my* team. You would see me bleeding Dodger blue should the rain not have washed any and all wounds away.)

Guess what?

The security guard staffing the stadium lobby had no idea what event I was talking about. Whatever, I knew I was early.

“I’m sorry ma’am. You’ll have to call your contact for an escort.”

Sure. No problem.

“We can’t have you waiting in the lobby.”

I’m sorry? Isn’t that the point of a lobby?

“You can wait outside, or check around at the gate,” my stern security guard informed me.

Seriously? It was pouring. I was drenched. (Literally dripping – soaked through and through. California doesn’t kid around when it decides to let down the drops, folks.) And you’re going to make me wait OUTSIDE?

THIS is why I hate the Giants.

Caffeine. I decided coffee would make everything better. Did you know that traffic signals are infinitely longer in the pouring rain? I discovered this as a bus drove by, splashing water over the curb and all over me just how you would expect it to happen in a sitcom.

Six blocks later, I found Starbucks. To their credit, the baristas did their best not to laugh at me when the cat dragged me in. Sitting in my camisole in an unsteady wooden chair, gratefully clutching my coffee while wringing out my suit jacket wasn’t quite the productive morning I’d pictured.

Just consider me the latest in fashion trendsetting. Because I was ROCKING the drowned rat look. I should have worn blue instead.

Despite a morning necessitating copious use of the word “cluster” for an accurate description, I am the proud new owner of a polka dotted umbrella. So I’ve got that going for me…