Tag Archives: biting

Inserting Logic Where It Doesn’t Belong


Search and Destroy have reached the age where their primary goal in life is to end their brother.

I remember this phase. I still bear the scars from where my own brother and I bashed each other in the face with Lego bricks. We spent a great many hours as best friends before reverting to mortal enemies in the blink of an eye – obviously required to engage in a physical battle to the death. (In adulthood, we are once again friends.)

My offspring are also now of an age where we are trying to instill the ideals of personal responsibility – reward and consequence. Continue reading

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The Dinosaur and the Watermelon (Based on a True Story)

Dinosaur Watermelon

Once upon a time there was a dinosaur.

He said RAWR. Others laughed when he rawred. Sometimes they would rawr back, which would make the dinosaur rawr louder.

Everyone would laugh. There would be more rawring. Louder rawring.

So much rawring can make a dinosaur hungry. (Dinosaurs can get very cranky if their blood sugar gets low, you know.)

But this story is about a smart dinosaur. Continue reading


The Zombie Apocalypse

Rest easy. The federal Centers for Disease Control and Prevention has assured the general public that zombies are not coming to eat our brains.

“‘CDC does not know of a virus or condition that would reanimate the dead (or one that would present zombie-like symptoms),’ wrote agency spokesman David Daigle in an email to The Huffington Post.” Continue reading


The Penalty Box

There are certain actions not tolerated in our household (or at school, hence a prior plethora of incident reports). Bad behavior leads to a stint in the penalty box. Time. Out.

“You do that, you go to the box.
Two minutes, by yourself and you feel shame.
And then you get free.”
Slap Shot Continue reading

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The Major Muppet Meltdown

I was just getting ready for a lunch meeting when my phone buzzed. My first inclination was to ignore it – my preference for most phone calls (email me please folks: tricia@streamoftheconscious.com) – but I saw the number.

I don’t even have the number programmed into my phone so I have those extra few moments of hope that it is not the preschool. Because nothing good ever comes from the preschool calling me in the middle of the day. Nothing.

Continue reading


Potty Humor, Part II

For those of you eagerly playing along at home, the score is now 4-for-4. And yes, this is the second post in a week dealing with bodily fluids. 

Search bit another one of his friends this afternoon and served actual time in the official preschool penalty box.

It was one of those days. Continue reading


The Hat Trick

Well, I walked right into that one. I posted on Facebook this morning,

“Dear Muppets,
2 days, 2 incident reports. Can we at least attempt to avoid the trifecta?
Love, Mom.”

My bad.

We hit the trifecta. At least it’s dispersed between children? Continue reading


Teething Bites

The muppets gummy grins have given way to a number of pearly white baby chompers. The addition of enamel is a whole new experience. “There’s something in my mouth…”

And unfortunately, their favorite chew toy appears to be each other. This is a problem, since the Parent/Teacher Handbook for the preschool they’re slated to start next week, explicitly calls this behavior out as a nono. Biting is an expellable offense.
Continue reading