What Makes a Man Sexy – A Generalization

This whole line of discussion got started with writer’s block. (You see what happens when you leave us writers to our own devices? And also likely wine.)

I was working on my contribution to “I’m Too Sexy for my Cat” over at This Is Mommyhood. (Trust me, you’re welcome.) And, as part of my due diligence research, I asked my friend Adam who he thought was sexy. And he defined it.

My kindergarten teacher wrote on my report card, “Tricia spends too much time playing with the boys.” (Perhaps, but I can play a mean game of pickle.) Over the years, I’ve had the opportunity to hone my own definition of sexy.

So, as promised – my take on what makes a man sexy. The female perspective. (Here’s a secret – us gals aren’t that complicated.) Let’s start with the basics.

Handsome.
Yup. Not going to lie. There’s a little bit of shallowness in us all. That initial “lust at first sight” idea plays a role in determining sexiness. Granted, we all have different standards of what is attractive, so I won’t get into too many specifics (all about abs and arms for me). But ultimately, sexy is someone who makes me smile when I look at them.

Also, I can’t resist a man in uniform. This brings me to my next point.

Athletic.
My first celebrity crush was Orel Hershiser of the 1988 Los Angeles Dodgers. (Tangent – 5 is my lucky number. Hershiser was #55. Coincidence?) I am not making this up.

Don’t worry – I’m not saying you have to be a ballplayer (unless you’re a left-handed pitcher, in which case that is the best pickup line ever), but it truly is tremendously sexy to notice that a guy takes care of himself. (Especially if you expect that of us.) And also that he won’t break. Because that would be icky and unfortunate.

Despite the modern year, a hint of chivalry is also nice. So I kind of like the thought that you could back me up if needed.

Smart.
I need to have intelligent conversations with a guy. Education is hot. I’ll admit to swooning over the correct use of a semi-colon. (This is presuming we are speaking about a guy I actually get to have conversation with. Celebrity sexies can just sit there and look pretty.) But as a fully admitted book nerd, a quiet, unassuming intelligence will make me swoon every time.

Funny.
Major points for making me laugh. Funny is really an over-simplification – but sense of humor is key. And bringing things full circle, this positive personality trait greatly enhances attractiveness. A sparkle in your eye and a fabulous smile are sexy. The ability to make *me* smile is SERIOUSLY sexy. (Again, back to point #1.)

But here’s the secret sauce that ties the above four traits into a tidy package of five. (Lucky number, remember.)

Confidence

Believe in yourself. Take pride in who you are. And you can easily create the illusion of all of the above.

Please note – there is a distinctly fine line between confident powerful poise and douchbaggery. Do not cross this line.

But just this side of that line? You’re gonna make me smile.