Tag Archives: valentine’s day

Valentine’s Day: Not Even Pinterest Enough to Fail

Heart Minnie

I won’t sugarcoat it. Valentine’s Day is not my thing.

It is a shmoopy memorial brought into being by the greeting card industry. A Hallmark holiday celebrated via a weaponized fat toddler (who would realistically kill the romance in any relationship with the pungent aroma of a full diaper if you weren’t first snipered by fallen pieces from a shattered Lego arrow). All while honoring a saint who was ultimately beheaded, via the grand gesture of murdered foliage most symbolized for its thorny exterior – evolved by nature to stab you should you look at it wrong. Continue reading

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My Funny Valentine

Valentine’s Day. And I had not one, but TWO fantabulous dates.

5:57 p.m.: Our dinner date begins. Continue reading


Why My Kids Will One Day Tell Their Therapist Mommy Never Loved Them

Happy Valentine’s Day.

This holiday isn’t really my cup of tea. Sweethearts taste like chalk and the over-abundance of cherry-flavored lollipops remind me of children’s medicine. Overpriced wilted roses and an exorbitantly priced prix-fixe menu with funny foods I don’t understand. (Give me a summer ballgame with a Dodger dog any day.)

I mean really, a day should not have so much pressure attached to it – especially when it doesn’t even come with a day off work! I do like the chocolate though. I would be happy to share yours. Continue reading


Cupid’s Kiss

Happy Valentine’s Day everyone!

I’ll admit, I’ve never been a big fan of this Hallmark holiday. I don’t really have a good reason why – especially since I’m such a huge fan of the assorted chocolates associated with it. Maybe it’s because there’s just so much pressure involved on what we’re “supposed” to do. Continue reading