{"id":3934,"date":"2014-06-26T07:26:53","date_gmt":"2014-06-26T14:26:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/streamoftheconscious.com\/?p=3934"},"modified":"2014-06-23T20:42:31","modified_gmt":"2014-06-24T03:42:31","slug":"techmom-tuesday-quite-the-sticky-pickle","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/streamoftheconscious.com\/techmom-tuesday-quite-the-sticky-pickle\/","title":{"rendered":"TechMom Tuesday: Quite the Sticky Pickle"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"TechMom\"<\/a><\/p>\n

I write a monthly column over at\u00a0AlliOSNews<\/a>. It\u2019s a techie site \u2013 extolling all the goodies and gunpowder on the Apple OS. (SHINY TOY!) I\u2019m TechMom. And these are my stories on how technology is really used. This is what you must deal with, as I am a Silicon Valley nerd by day.<\/i><\/p>\n

I\u2019m well aware it\u2019s Thursday. TechMom Tuesday is typically published the first Tuesday of every month, but this month your techie insights were delivered late\u00a0because I went on vacation and then the regularly scheduled belated column was derailed due to\u00a0technology fire drills. I reserve the right to rant more or less as the technical goings-on, well\u2026go on.<\/i><\/p>\n

Today\u2019s column is brought to you by the theme of \u201cWell no kidding Captain Obvious.\u201d But I shall share this tale of terror as a reminder to everyone out there.<\/p>\n

Under no circumstance, should you use your laptop in the presence of liquids \u2013 especially any containing sweetener. Syrup will congeal to create quite the sticky situation within the innards of your technological device.<\/p>\n

Last week I tucked the TechTots into bed and retired to the comfort of the couch. For company, my crotchety old dog curled up beside me, my 13\u201d MacBook Air, and a delicious adult beverage I\u2019d just concocted. I leaned back to grab my napkin and my fancy glass tipped forward.<\/p>\n

I saw the small pooling puddles breaking off in militaristic formation across my track pad like angels of death; splashes sullied the bright white markings on the black keys. The napkin was now mission critical. I sopped up the spill and, heart pounding, continued working on a much-delayed TechMom Tuesday for you. I thought I may have escaped unscathed.<\/p>\n

But the series of unfortunate events was just beginning.<\/p>\n

When my OS X baby was next undocked for my relaxation and writing ritual the following evening, I noticed a distinct lack of clicking when I attempted to navigate the wonders of the inter webs with my mouse. (Just to be sure, I rebooted. Because that is what one does whenever faced with a potential technological problem. You are likely not shocked that nothing changed.)<\/p>\n

As I twisted and turned my machine around within various visual points of view, the contraband goo snuggly stuck within the track pad \u2013 mocking me with its vice-like sticky grip \u2013 as I stared into a kaleidoscopic precipice of horror.<\/p>\n

My first reaction was to flip my technological appendage onto its back and immediately pry the casing off. All I needed was some glass cleaner and I could wipe my track pad off and be back in business in no time!<\/p>\n

Ladies and gentlemen, this is very very wrong.<\/p>\n

For starters, Apple doesn\u2019t use standard screws. You need a special tool to breach the defenses of outer realms (which is totally not fair because the liquid intruder just oozed right on in). Using a standard Phillips head could result in stripping the screws so that no one can get in. Ever again.<\/p>\n

Second, the innards of your computer are tiny and tricky to navigate \u2013 including both the battery (which could potentially warp and explode) and the hard drive (without which you have a very large paperweight).<\/p>\n

I was strongly encouraged to leave this to the professionals.<\/p>\n

I made an appointment at the Genius Bar, finding one only slightly way out of my way because they had a next day appointment. PRIORITIES, PEOPLE!<\/p>\n

It was all planned out \u2013 our TechFamily would head down to the Farmer\u2019s Market, enjoy some local produce, then I\u2019d dash over to the Apple Store, get a quick wipe down and continue about our idyllic sunny summer Sunday.<\/p>\n

Suddenly the fog of an out-of-body experience overcame me. Apple employees in blue shirts moved around me, customers swarmed the shiny screens and I heard a muted voice cutting through the haze.<\/p>\n

\u201cGood news, I didn\u2019t find any indication of liquid damage. But the track pad is completely warped; I recommend a replacement. Now, we do have the part in stock, so would you like to go ahead and check in your computer? We can quote you now, and should be able to give you a call that it\u2019s ready by tomorrow morning.\u201d<\/p>\n

What? I was expected to voluntarily hand over my laptop to these strange people for multiple hours? They wanted me to exit their establishment without my machine?<\/p>\n

PANIC AT THE DISCO!<\/p>\n

I wasn\u2019t sure what to do. \u201cI don\u2019t know how long I can be without my computer,\u201d I muttered feebly at the very nice genius. \u201cIs there any chance I can get it back today?\u201d<\/p>\n

Oh how our device addiction strangles us. I was still in possession of my waterproof iPhone<\/a> and my iPad. I could still write \u2013 all of my key documents live in the cloud. Aside from the frenzy of stress stemming from my own careless grip on the stem of a wine glass, the only real burden would be attempting to brave the workday with only iOS devices.<\/p>\n

See, I work in a BYOD environment. From a corporate perspective this translates to \u201cBring Your Own Device\u201d \u2013 an option for employees to use the technology they prefer. For many employees, this translates to \u201cI don\u2019t want to use that bulky bulk-rate PC you otherwise typically provide.\u201d<\/p>\n

We\u2019ll see how the iDevice experiment goes (although maybe I\u2019ll just start with a weekend \u2013 a whole work day sounds a smidge too traumatic for me) and just maybe my next computer will be an iMac.<\/p>\n

One that will live in a transformed clean room where no dust can enter \u2013 much less a drop of liquid.<\/p>\n

\"DontDrink\"<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I write a monthly column over at\u00a0AlliOSNews. It\u2019s a techie site \u2013 extolling all the goodies and gunpowder on the Apple OS. (SHINY TOY!) I\u2019m TechMom. And these are my stories on how technology is really used. This is what … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true},"categories":[943],"tags":[983,1631,1633,442,1632],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p3Sbzi-11s","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":3576,"url":"https:\/\/streamoftheconscious.com\/techmom-tuesday-sounds-like-a-mac-issue\/","url_meta":{"origin":3934,"position":0},"title":"TechMom Tuesday: Sounds Like a Mac Issue","date":"September 19, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"I write a monthly column over at\u00a0AlliOSNews. It\u2019s a techie site \u2013 extolling all the goodies and gunpowder on the Apple OS. (SHINY TOY!) I\u2019m TechMom. And these are my stories on how technology is really used. This is what you must deal with, as I am a Silicon Valley\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "TechMomTuesday"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/streamoftheconscious.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/09\/Apple-Store-e1379022429962-225x300.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":2930,"url":"https:\/\/streamoftheconscious.com\/techmom-tuesday-the-lifesaving-impact-of-technology\/","url_meta":{"origin":3934,"position":1},"title":"TechMom Tuesday: The Lifesaving Impact of Technology","date":"November 21, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"I write a monthly column over at AlliOSNews. It's a techie site - extolling all the goodies and gunpowder on the Apple OS. (SHINY TOY!) I'm TechMom. And these are my stories on how technology is really used. 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