{"id":2827,"date":"2012-10-05T07:08:53","date_gmt":"2012-10-05T14:08:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.streamdoubletrouble.com\/?p=2827"},"modified":"2012-10-04T22:14:18","modified_gmt":"2012-10-05T05:14:18","slug":"professional-mommy-style","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/streamoftheconscious.com\/professional-mommy-style\/","title":{"rendered":"Professional Mommy Style"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Today I was faced with a detrimental project problem at work. I looked down the length the conference table and announced, \u201cMake it work!\u201d Because there is really no situation that cannot benefit from the sage advice of fashion guru Tim Gunn.<\/p>\n

I was met with a silent host of blank stares. I realized I was surrounded by computer engineers. This was quite clearly my most impressive Know Your Audience fail yet.<\/p>\n

If you\u2019d have told me 10 years ago that I would one day be experimenting with colors of makeup that complemented a wardrobe of pencil skirts for everyday business dress everyday, and that I\u2019d stockpile a rainbow selection of stilettos to finish the look, I\u2019d have told you to share what you were smoking.<\/p>\n

And yet here we are. The tomboy in me has been threatened with hospital gowns, sweated out of decade-old t-shirts, spit up on and ultimately experienced the fantabulous skincare benefits of a baby food facial.<\/p>\n

But here\u2019s the secret to my sophisticated put together look. It\u2019s all about Occam’s Razor \u2013 the simplest solution is usually the answer. And that answer has no delusions of Supermom grandeur<\/a>. (We can\u2019t all be you, Marrisa Mayer \u2013 we all know my Yahoo maternity plan wasn\u2019t remotely as planned or organized.)<\/p>\n

On school day mornings I take a few selfish moments and actually pay attention to what I\u2019m doing. (Usually determined by asking myself what would be completely inappropriate for an afternoon of mudpies and slimy creepy-crawlies, but apparently totally ok to have spilled down my front during a mid-day coffee break.)<\/p>\n

Barring an additional hit of the snooze button, hitting the office is a prime opportunity to dress like a grownup. (I know, stop laughing. It\u2019s all part of my clever disguise of being an adult and put together.)<\/p>\n

The following conversation actually happened:<\/p>\n

Colleague: Did you do something to your hair?<\/em><\/p>\n

Me: It’s down today.<\/em><\/p>\n

Colleague: It looks different.<\/em><\/p>\n

Me: It’s usually up.<\/em><\/p>\n

Colleague: Because it’s like\u2026long now.<\/em><\/p>\n

Me: That\u2019s because it’s down.<\/em><\/p>\n

Later that day:<\/p>\n

Colleague: I\u2019ve been meaning to ask you, why does the Snow White on your laptop have glasses?<\/em><\/p>\n

(That\u2019s right folks, even my Macbook Air is stylin\u2019.)<\/p>\n

I stared back at him through my big red-rimmed glasses.<\/p>\n

Me: Occam, man. Occam.<\/em><\/p>\n

This afternoon I was wrangling cranky muppets from the preschool playground. I confiscated a broom. (I know \u2013 all those toys and learning tools, and it\u2019s the household apparatus to sweep up crushed Cheerios that becomes the object of obsession.)<\/p>\n

Search melted. Wriggling, writhing and hysterical, he passionately expressed his emotions \u2013 biting and tearing buttons from my blouse.<\/p>\n

Yeah\u2026that\u2019s not how this fantasy ever went in my head. I didn\u2019t look a thing like I thought I did at the start of the day. But I like to think I made it work.<\/p>\n

Life. Make it work!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Today I was faced with a detrimental project problem at work. I looked down the length the conference table and announced, \u201cMake it work!\u201d Because there is really no situation that cannot benefit from the sage advice of fashion guru … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true},"categories":[16,36],"tags":[114,1053,1052,1051,384],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p3Sbzi-JB","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":1506,"url":"https:\/\/streamoftheconscious.com\/there%e2%80%99s-gotta-be-a-way\/","url_meta":{"origin":2827,"position":0},"title":"There\u2019s Gotta Be A Way","date":"June 27, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"Someway, somehow \u2013 when I wasn\u2019t looking \u2013 my tiny babies got big. And during that time the debate between being a stay-at-home-mom vs. working mother raged on. I am a working mother and I make no apologies for that. The Mrs. Cleaver ideal still persists: the perfect mother, waiting\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Home"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.streamdoubletrouble.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/06\/Destroy_Walker_06-27-11-225x300.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":4023,"url":"https:\/\/streamoftheconscious.com\/sorry-had-to-go-see-about-a-ball\/","url_meta":{"origin":2827,"position":1},"title":"Sorry, Had to Go See About a Ball","date":"September 23, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"\u00a0 I died on a Tuesday. I was old. My once golden fur had long since faded to white. My joints ached. My body hurt. The seizures were robbing my mind of more of me every day. I\u2019d wandered the backyard. I tossed my tire rope to myself for a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Pets"","img":{"alt_text":"I love you","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/streamoftheconscious.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/I-love-you.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":3952,"url":"https:\/\/streamoftheconscious.com\/high-school-never-ends\/","url_meta":{"origin":2827,"position":2},"title":"High School Never Ends","date":"July 10, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Have you ever wondered what the heck your preschooler is obsessing over? It may be a Disney Jr. show (and accompanying characters). Below is a handy reference guide to the current on-demand of shows to watch ad nauseam. For adult clarification and understanding, the house of mouse offerings are categorized\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Current Events"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":564,"url":"https:\/\/streamoftheconscious.com\/due-date\/","url_meta":{"origin":2827,"position":3},"title":"Due Date","date":"August 23, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"It\u2019s been 12 weeks coming; today the muppets are officially newborns. Their corrected age is zero. Since the day the muppets were born we\u2019ve been counting down their gestational age and today is 40 weeks. Today is their due date. If all had gone as initially medically planned, I would\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Birthday"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":621,"url":"https:\/\/streamoftheconscious.com\/the-long-awaited-much-anticipated\/","url_meta":{"origin":2827,"position":4},"title":"The Long Awaited, Much Anticipated","date":"September 11, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"Last night I promised you more photos. Remember the family photo shoot I told you about in August? The full collection has arrived! These photos are amazing memories for our family. You can peruse them for entertainment or to procure your very own muppet memento. Step 1: Navigate to the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Baby Photos"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/streamdoubletrouble.files.wordpress.com\/2010\/09\/keary.jpg?w=350&h=200&crop=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":218,"url":"https:\/\/streamoftheconscious.com\/kangaroo-kare\/","url_meta":{"origin":2827,"position":5},"title":"Kangaroo Kare","date":"June 2, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"I didn\u2019t plan to write a post today. I thought perhaps I\u2019d take a day off to try and accomplish some of the items on my to-do list. But then Kangaroo Kare became a part of my new routine. This just had to be shared. For those of you expecting\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Baby Photos"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/streamdoubletrouble.files.wordpress.com\/2010\/06\/img_0409.jpg?w=350&h=200&crop=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/streamoftheconscious.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2827"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/streamoftheconscious.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/streamoftheconscious.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/streamoftheconscious.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/streamoftheconscious.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2827"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/streamoftheconscious.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2827\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/streamoftheconscious.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2827"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/streamoftheconscious.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2827"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/streamoftheconscious.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2827"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}