Tag Archives: daycare

How to Exhaust a Muppet

DEFINITION: Boy, n.: a noise with dirt on it. (Courtesy of A Daddy Blog)

Search was not wearing the outfit I dropped him off in this morning. He toddled around the corner, followed shortly by teacher Miss Stephanie. “We’re going to need more wipes.”

Seventeen outfits, 10 kiwis, 386 baby wipes, two runny noses, two incident reports, one hacking cough, one flesh wound, one black eye, and we’ve hit the second week of daycare running.
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Mary Poppins

Great news – we still have a nanny.

Several months ago, while the muppets were still hanging out in the NICU, I went to lunch with a dear friend. Upon completion of our meal, we discovered the keys to her car were locked in the trunk. So, we perched ourselves on a nearby patch of grass and began to chat about childcare as we waited for her husband to arrive with a rescue set of keys.

Her son, an adorable two and a half year old, had outgrown his personal nanny. My friend was lamenting that fact, and wanted to find a new home for this wonderful nanny. Around this point in time, it occurred to me that when the muppets came home from the hospital, I would be returning to work a mere 24 days later.

We were going to need childcare.

I was paranoid. Who was I going to leave my little muppets with? After all, these are special muppets – their care is not to be taken lightly. My friend mentioned that their nanny was looking for part time work. She began telling me about this allegedly fabulous caregiver, Holly.

Holly was a long-time family friend. Her educational background was in early childhood development. She’d spent a number of years nannying before becoming a teacher. Then she became pregnant – her son was born premature, and she quit teaching to raise her own kids. Now that her kids are big school-aged peoples, she’s back in the nannying game.

My mouth was agape. We had located Marry Poppins. Holly was practically perfect in every way. I began phone and Facebook stalking her. We MUST have her as our nanny. I was on a mission.

A couple weeks after the muppets came home and a couple weeks before I went back to work we succeeded! Holly would be watching Search and Destroy on Mondays. (She even sings to them. And goodness knows having Mom sing to them is more like a punishment – no matter how much they seem to like music.) It was love at first sight. We had a good deal going.

The end of the first month with Holly came, and I wrote her a check as we had agreed upon. And that’s when the bank tried to throw a wrench in our arrangement. Holly decided to cash the check. This seemed like a logical move in both our minds. The bank thought otherwise.

I was typing away on my computer at work when my phone buzzed. (I don’t get reception in the heart of Silicon Valley where I work, so my phone was alerting me to a voicemail.) It was the bank. They wanted to speak with me because there was a woman trying to cash a suspicious check.

“We have a “Holly” trying to cash a check allegedly issued by you.”

“That’s our nanny,” I assured the bank man. “Please pay the woman.” Turns out, they’d already sent her away. Check in hand, but no cash. Now, I understand that they are concerned about fraudulent activities, and I appreciate that. (This begs the whole other question of why they sent her away with the check if they thought she was a master criminal…) But I just wanted to assure them that they should, in fact, give her the money as noted in the very much valid and real check.

The bank man then explained that the reason they were so concerned about the possibility of fraud is because there was only $6 in my account. This concerned me immensely. I got a bank manager on the line and explained that if there was only $6 in my account, we needed to step away from the valid nanny payment and begin discussing police reports. Problem was, I was looking at my account info online. And all appeared well in cyberland.

“Ohhh,” the bank manager finally sighed. “It appears we were looking at your credit card balance. Sorry.”

Fabulous. I immediately called Holly, apologizing profusely. I repeatedly assure her the funds existed and that her new family was not a bunch of deadbeats. Thankfully, she found the entire situation humorous (far more so than I).

Imagine my relief that she still loves us. This morning, when Holly arrived, Search and I greeted her at the door. Search welcomed her with a giant smile. Muppet approved.