In July 2009, I traveled up to Portland, Ore., to celebrate the baby shower of my college roommate. After the shower we braved the wiles of Babies R Us to pick up some last minute staples. My roommate was very pregnant at the time, so I was sent scurrying around the multitude of baby â€œnecessitiesâ€ to retrieve the required items.
In the chaos that is a childrenâ€™s store, nothing is where logic dictates youâ€™d likely find it. So in one of my many criss-crosses across the store, I passed a collection of sheriff and outlaw little boys clothes. My girlfriend was having a little girl, so I merely smiled in admiration to myself and returned to my quest for side-snap onesies. (Surprisingly, these are not found with the rest of the clothes.)
In August 2009, our friendâ€™s little monkey had his first birthday. Iâ€™ve long felt that overalls are adorable on little boys. So I decided to chance my luck back in the baby warehouse. The sheriff and outlaw collection was still displayed. I was tickled blue (these were for a boy after all) to find a pair of 12-month overalls with an â€œoutlawâ€ cowdog riding a horse on the back. Success! When I circled the rack, I saw the Little Sheriff onesie with the deputy cowdog smiling back at me.
I wasnâ€™t pregnant. The muppets were nothing more than a dim glimmer â€“ not even a twinkle â€“ in our eyes. But I was in love with the outfit. I rationalized that if we had a girl, I could put cute a brown corduroy skirt with it. I bought the onesie â€“ size 0-3 months. I brought it home, folded it up and put it away in the back of my closet.
The day we got the call saying our pregnancy test was positive I took the outfit out to stare at it. It was so tiny. Jon laughed, saying, â€œOur baby is never going to fit in that!â€
I took the Little Sheriff out again the day we found out the muppets were boys. Since my arfing spells had drastically decreased by week 16, I used my newfound free time to daydream about what my little sheriffs would be like in the first outfit Iâ€™d ever bought for them.
Three months later, we had very very tiny muppets. When they were born, they were too small for clothes; they only wore a diaper. Size 0-3 months was going to be a long time coming.
We got excited when we dressed them in their first preemie outfit. We rejoiced when they were big enough for newborn clothes.
One month ago today, on Aug. 6, 2010, little Destroy came home. During this past month, he has demonstrated his love for food. And today, at a hefty 10 pounds, Destroy debuted the Little Sheriff onesie.
The month has gone by quickly. Weâ€™re definitely more comfortable with the boys and theyâ€™re certainly becoming more like â€œtypicalâ€ babies. Destroy has completely outgrown newborn size and is now only wearing the long awaited 0-3 months size. Search is not far behind â€“ his rapidly growing tummy can no longer accommodate newborn size pants.
Watch out world â€“ weâ€™ve got a new sheriff in town.