Either I mistake your shape and making quite,
Or else you are that shrewd and knavish sprite
Call’d Robin Goodfellow: are not you he
That frights the maidens of the villagery;
Skim milk, and sometimes labour in the quern
And bootless make the breathless housewife churn;
And sometime make the drink to bear no barm;
Mislead night-wanderers, laughing at their harm?
Those that Hobgoblin call you and sweet Puck,
You do their work, and they shall have good luck:
Are not you he?
Sometimes I look at my sons and I see them growing up before me. Theyâ€™ve become little men before my eyes. Last Thanksgiving, the muppets could barely hold their own heads aloft. Today theyâ€™re on a tear to get into everything and anything around them.
Theyâ€™re certainly demonstrating that theyâ€™ve got minds of their very own.
This weekend, Destroy decided he didnâ€™t want to nap. He screamed bloody murder until I finally went to check on him. (Iâ€™m not a bad parent, but he knows how to push boundaries, so he has a 15-minute cry it out period. Donâ€™t judge me people!)
â€œNotice anything missing?â€ I asked when I brought him upstairs?
In the absence of photographic evidence, Iâ€™ll give you a clue. My little Destroy had removed his pants (diaper included). It remains unclear if he awoke because he felt a draft or if he became so hysterically angry at not getting his way that he began ripping off his clothes.
Rumor has it that I used to have exorcist-style tantrums when I was his age â€“ screaming bloody murder and disrobing. (I was allegedly a bit of a handful as a small, medium and large child.)
Recently, while admiring how well behaved my million dollar miracle muppets are (prior to the sleep stripping incident), my parents noted that it was amazing how I could handle two children when raising just the single me took the patience of Job as I buzzed around with the determination of stubborn triplets. It was actually a miracle my brother was ever born, they reassured me.
STOP TRYING TO CURSE ME WITH KARMA!
Note â€“ I know I am loved. And while I do not explicitly recall my toddler years, I do remember being a teenager. So, cards on the table â€“ yes, itâ€™s a miracle my parents had another kid. And also, stop trying to curse me with karma.
In all fairness, the muppets certainly did give me a run for my money as they started life. (You think?)
You see, appearances can be deceiving. A scant year and a half ago, you may have looked down upon the muppets as mere mewling invalids â€“ tiny 2-pound creatures struggling for survival. But under the faÃ§ade of translucently wrinkled skin, preemie pattern baldness and cocoon of wires and sensors were two of the toughest men youâ€™ll ever meet.
These clever and mischievous elves personify strength and stubbornness. They are pure, unadulterated exhaustion love.
Tonight, as I lay them down in bed, I told them I loved them. I told them Iâ€™ve known how much power they have in their little punches for a lot longer than 18 months. I thanked my lucky stars I have such good kids.
They stood up in their crib. Destroy gave me a devilish cockeyed grin. And clear as day, Search announced, â€œUh oh!â€
They are their motherâ€™s sons. Damnit karmaâ€¦